How do you honor your spirit, your life force, your soul?
I happened to peer out the door before going to bed and saw stars. I grabbed my coat, gloves and a blanket because lately stars have been rare in the winter sky I love so.
I stood bundled in the back yard after midnight looking up. My body felt the inner Ahh that words fall short of explaining. Then I glanced toward the neighbor's house. Did I see smoke? No, it was my breath made visible due to their porch light.
With this, a memory rose of being a kid blowing smoke in the cold. This and candy cigarettes were as close to smoking as I got. I thought of people who smoke as well as dragons with their fiery breath.
The much maligned and misunderstood dragon represents something that needs to be transmuted or changed rather than slain.
With a cup of hot tea under the sparkling sky, I sat wondering what offers itself up to be transmuted and shifted through compulsions. What is trying to make itself known within a person's experience that smoking or addiction squelches?
I also realized this little spot of earth is where we have three birds feeders. And it is where we smelled cigarette smoke on different occasions that were anniversaries related to my father. My father is dead. My father loved birds and yes, he smoked.
My father's smoking ultimately squelched him. I never knew what the dance with his dragon was trying to alter. I never fully showed up in my heart with him. I came so close in his dying weeks. And I had experiences with him that I hadn't had prior, but I never allowed him to fully see me. With my father, I didn't allow my own dragon to change my fear of judgement to joy and freedom.
Before coming inside, I stood again in the middle of my little yard. I took deep breathes and with each exhale came beautiful smoke - spirit, life force and soul made visible.
If these things - spirit, life force, soul - were honored compulsions would lessen.
Dragons and We would be free.
-Dawn, The Good News Muse , 6 March 2014
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